Top 3 Rules about Effective Self-Care

Self care isn't easy and it's not something you can just do. It takes time and lots of self love to effectively perform self care. It takes months or years of trial and error and figuring out what's best for you. The key word is effective! Many people, especially college students, disregard effective self care because it's seen of little importance or there are factors hindering you from performing effective self care such as a busy schedule. There's more to effective self care than ensuring that your basic needs are met. Let me list them out for you!

1. Positivity

You need positivity in your life. It affects who you are tremendously. Hanging around negative people will make you negative as well. For example, I used to hang around people who used to talk down other people in our school. And guess what ? I started doing the same thing and I got pulled into a flood of drama which detrimentally affected my mood which lowered my motivation to go to school and resulted in me getting lower grades. It's a butterfly affect. But luckily, positivity is one one too.

To maintain positivity in your life, you need to have the right mindset. Push yourself to do better. Stop doubting yourself and letting fear hold you back from trying. Here are positive affirmations that can substitute negative thoughts:

Negative: I can't do it

Positive: I believe in my abilities

Negative: I f**ked up again

Positive: I am not my mistakes

Negative: I am having a terrible day

Positive: Positivity is a choice and I choose to be positive.

Positivity is a byproduct of optimism , as shown in these affirmations. Optimism is knowing that things aren't as good as they may seem but willing working towards making it better and that all started with a positive mindset.

2. Taking time for yourself

Needless to say, a college students schedule usually comprises of school, study , work ( if they have jobs), and sleep. It is also needless to say that college students are stressed and don't get enough sleep. Many students overwork theirselves which can ultimately lead to depression and/or tire you out. However, there are some exceptions. (THERE'S ALWAYS EXCEPTIONS) There are those students who find time to go to the gym , who take some time to take naps, who reads book that they enjoy ( not assigned by professors),etc. These people are definitely improving their well being. Even though college is stressful, it shouldn't be detrimental. That being said, take some time out of your day and dedicate it to something that isn't stressful and I DON'T mean partying. Taking time for yourself should be beneficial to you ( and sadly, partying isn't super beneficial when it comes to improving yourself ..... unless you want to be the best party animal). This includes dancing, learning a new language, learning how to sing, draw, etc. Basically, developing or improving a skill that you enjoy. Think of something that you've always wanted to learn and dedicate a small portion of your time towards it. For me, it's dancing. Dancing makes me feel like myself. I feel free and impeccable when I dance and I BARELY KNOW HOW. Despite that, I still dedicate time to it because it's productive, skillful, and keeps me sane.

3. Figure out who you are

As I've said before, figuring out who you are is key to self care. Think of it this way. Before you go to your doctor's appointment, your doctor will usually look in a folder with your name on it. In the folder, it tell them anything they need to know about you so that they can provide the best care. This include age, previous medical issues, height,etc. They must know who you are before they can treat you. Similarly, you must do the same for yourself. Figure you what you like and silk. Figure out what you value in yourself and others. What are your goals? What makes you happy? What type of gender are you attracted to?

Asking yourself questions like these will help you develop a better understanding of who you are. This will then allow you to provide effective self care. Before I gained a better understanding of who I was, I wasted so much money buying things that I assumed would make me happy. I bought a journal because for a while , I thought I was one of those people who liked to write how they felt.

I never laid a finger on that journal.

I also bought a keyboard but let's not talk about that ! The point I'm trying to make is that figuring out who you are before you explore different ways to self soothe and perform self care is beneficial.

Now that I've given you my top three tips, try applying it to your life and see how it works out!